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Feb 25

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Getting My Ba Donk a Donk Back

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The Horrible Housewife gains another pound and still is getting her ba donk a donk back

It’s week 5 of healthy living and my weight loss journey hasn’t been good if you are looking at the scale. If you are looking at my ba donk a donk then you might say this weight loss journey is going very well! Did you know men use the phrase ‘mom butt’ when talking about a backside that you can’t tell where the butt and thigh meet? When did mom butt become a thing? I get that you can kiss your perky breasts goodbye, but what does a kid have to do with my salt shaker?

In case you can’t listen to how I’m getting my ba donk a donk back

Starting your morning off eating apples with your toddler is a great way to get your ba donk a donk in shape! {Horrible Housewife}

This is how we spend our mornings. Glamorous, right? We eat one booger for every apple slice to ensure we get our daily requirement of green stuff. Who needs apples and peanut butter when you have apples and boogers? You won’t ever be able to look at an apple the same way. :)
Goldfish don't help get the Horrible Housewife's ba donk a donk get back in shape Confession- I’m addicted to Goldfish. I love them. I eat them when I’m not hungry because I love them. I love the salty goodness that comes with a Goldfish, and I never say I love the salty goodness that comes with anything. I eat them when I’m working late at night and tired because they keep me awake until I get my second wind. It’s a really bad habit.

I have an inkling that my lard ass isn’t losing weight because of these delightful fishies. I know I need to stop eating them. You see, they creep into the house because we buy them for Michael. He loves them. What kid doesn’t like Goldfish? What human being doesn’t like Goldfish? Those of us trying to get our ba donk a donk in tip top shape!

I hope your scale is going the opposite of mine!


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About the author


My name is Mallery and I am a recovering workaholic. I curse like a sailor. I'm a mix of obsessive and awkward. I talk about bowel habits more than I should and I enjoy wine, gaming, and tattoos.

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  1. Shannon (The Mommy-Files)

    You can do it mama! You are too funny! An apple and a booger a day will keep the mom butt away? LOL
    Shannon (The Mommy-Files) recently posted..Love Every Sip of Life with Diet Pepsi + $50 Gift Card GiveawayMy Profile


  2. Elizabeth L

    Kids eh? I’m struggling to lose my pregnancy weight STILL. I think I weigh more now than before I gave birth to her. I don’t have the mommy butt though, just a mommy tummy. Eww.
    Elizabeth L recently posted..DIY Soda with SodaStream™ Fizz Home Soda MakerMy Profile


  3. Theresa

    Your son is too cute.


  4. JanetGoingCrazy

    Goldfish are evil little creatures that swim their way into the house and my boy rarely gets to eat many. He may or may not have to grab them from my grubby hands and say, “mommy, save some for me!”. We are on a kickstart again this week so I’m hoping to see the scale move down on Friday. :)
    JanetGoingCrazy recently posted..Blog Guilt and Mommy Guilt: I shouldn’t, but I doMy Profile


  5. Joyce@MommyTalkShow

    One of the first questions I’d like to ask God one day – is why did he make children’s fingers the perfect size to fit into their noses…
    Joyce@MommyTalkShow recently posted..Video: Home Depot #DIHWorkshop Project for WomenMy Profile


  6. paula schuck

    Ba donk a donk you made me laugh my butt off!
    paula schuck recently posted..Sewing with Kids #DIY Fleece Blanket – Crafty LinkupMy Profile


  7. Michelle @ MK2SAHM

    Keep up the good work!
    I”m on a get healthy / work out journey right now too! http://mk2sahm.blogspot.ca/2013/02/getting-healthy-week-3-of-insanity.html
    Michelle @ MK2SAHM recently posted..Wordless Wednesday: Pink Shirt Day February 27, 2013My Profile


    Mallery Reply:

    Good luck to you! I’ve heard good things about insanity.


  8. Summer

    So did Paleo last like 14 hours?

    Goldfish ARE delicious. As are Oreos. *sigh* I shouldn’t go shopping right now. :/
    Summer recently posted..URGENT! The Amazing Nerd Goes Bald – Help Raise Money for Cancer AwarenessMy Profile


    Mallery Reply:

    I have been doing my organic meat pricing before we jump into this. He will feel better about it knowing we are getting the best price on expensive animals. Oreos are delightful!


  9. **Nicole**

    These are totally my greatest nemisis too–when I was nursing I seriously ate an ENTIRE BIG box of them in one week, true story. I actually won’t by them for my kids because I eat them all…that’s how serious my addiction is to them, hahaha!

    I’m also in the process of getting my badonkadonka back–here’s to us beating the goldfish and losing the weight, haha! 😀
    **Nicole** recently posted..Ways to Wear a Scarf ~ The Infinite ScarfMy Profile


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