Apr 20
Are you ready for a pink Bud Light drinking game in honor of Christy Gossett’s birthday? Give me a WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTT! (<~ Obnoxious, I know, but she is having a down in the doldrums birthday and that is so uncool.) I drank Bud Light! Did you see that? That was a Bud Light on my lips! ON …
Apr 02
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. You look like a monkey and you totally smelled like a monkey’s ass the day after your party. For real. Michael had the time of his life at his little LAN birthday party and drank enough that even he couldn’t stand his own ass stench. His odor …
Mar 11
Wine with Mallery IS BACK with a special happy birthday to a not so special Jillian Warner! Or vise versa? Who knows. This is what I do know about the birthday girl’s video: My teeth are purple. I’m blitzed. I sing to the birthday girl. You shouldn’t watch it unless you want to laugh your …
Oct 06
I have this BFF named Lindsay Decker and she is amazing. I’m sure you knew that already because you are so loyal that you never miss a post, you think I am the gospel and you can’t live without me. Hmm… exaggerate much? I guess it just makes me feel better to think that goes through …
Sep 02
I am finally cruising through my yellow birthday party stuff! It was a scorcher on my birthday so ice was out of the picture when I was thinking about how to keep my drinks cool. Of course I was browsing Pinterest when I stumbled upon a genius ice cube idea! I used lemonade instead of …
Aug 31
I had this idea for a yellow birthday party that consisted of yellow sangria and yellow decorations, just to name a few. I even wore a yellow shirt to my soiree! It’s one of those shirts that no matter how bloated you feel you look MARvelous in! Every woman has a shirt like that and …
Jul 26
Did you check out the retro looking cupcakes that I made for Michael’s first birthday last week? Well I told you that this recipe doubled as some cake batter Rice Krispies treats so here is me delivering on that promise! They were so much better than the yellow cake batter treats that I made; …
Jul 24
Where’s Mallery? No, I didn’t overdose on pills and I am not a pill junky but I do shoot up every month. I had a whirlwind of a weekend since Michael’s first birthday party was Saturday and I had just about everyone that I know at my house. Sunday I caught up on my very …
Jul 20
Funfetti cake mix + Rice Krispies = Amazing! In case you didn’t already know, I am a Rice Krispies treat fanatic and they were even my breakfast this morning! Not the cereal; I am talking about the gooey goodness that is in a bar. This post isn’t about Rice Krispies treats, that post will come …
Jul 19
Remember how I mentioned that I had a birthday recently? Yay for being 25! Well did you know that my whole party was pretty much yellow? Yep, everything from the decorations, food and even our outfits were yellow! <~~ Weirdos, I know. All I can think of when I see lemons in a jar is, …
Loading tweets...